Cross Family Thankgiving

Thanksgiving Idea and a reflection on thankfulness from realmarriedlife.comIn our living room sits an over-sized pink chair.  I like to think of it as red.  Maybe that’s because it helps me think of it as a piece fitting with our decor. . . rather than the old, college dorm, hand-me-down pink chair it actually is.  With a newborn, I spend plenty of time there these days.  To keep the days and nights from blending together, I move my camp from a grey chair in the nursery at night to the pink (“red”) chair during the day.  I spend several hours in that old chair every day. Even though more of those hours are spent learning about home renovations and contemporary furniture on HGTV than I would care to admit, for the most part my time in the pink chair is anything but exciting.  The days can be long, I can feel discontent, and the demands of life can get me down.

But on our living room wall, directly across [Read more…]

Why I Check Up On My Husband

Should you check in with your spouse everyday?  Article about communicate from realmarriedlife.comBen and I contact each other at some point throughout the day – everyday.

It’s not that I feel the need to be nosy.  And it’s not that I have to know what he’s doing at every given moment.  Here’s what it is… It’s important for us to hear from each other and feel connected even when we’re apart.  It’s part of how we continually build our friendship and marriage.  Here’s a few ways that we find this to be beneficial: [Read more…]

Date Night After Baby

How Soon Do You Have a Date Night After Having a Baby?We are celebrating the arrival of our baby girl Elliot!  This is our first child, so life is certainly an adjustment for both of us becoming mom and dad.  We had a wonderful birth experience, and you can read our birth story here.

When I was pregnant, I read First-Time Mom by Dr. Kevin Leman.  It was a wonderful resource, and I’m looking forward to re-reading it now that motherhood is here!  The book gives a challenge to parents to accomplish in the first ten days of their baby’s life – leave them.  The assignment is to go out with your spouse for some date time and work on your relationship – talk just about you.

So when [Read more…]

Quit Asking Your Spouse How Their Day Was

Stop Asking Your Spouse How Their Day WasAfter a day apart, the first thing Ben and I ask each other when we get home is “How was your day?”  I’ve missed him all day long and can’t wait to be together!  I’m sure most of you do the same.  But lately we’re learning that’s the wrong question to ask… It’s not often [Read more…]

Carissa + Travis: The Beauty of Marriage

Interview with Carissa:  The Beauty of Marriage | realmarriedlife.comI get the chance to meet some really special couples in my work as a wedding coordinator.  It’s one of my favorite parts of my job.  One of those couples, Travis & Carissa, just celebrated their first wedding anniversary, and I would love for you to meet them!  What I love about Carissa and Travis is how committed they are to one another and to starting their marriage in the right way.

I asked Carissa to share her thoughts with you about marriage lessons they have learned over this first year.  They have some great wisdom for couples in any stage – about seeking counsel, communication, accepting change, [Read more…]

Am I A Good Wife?

Reminders about what actually makes us a good spouse | Marriage thoughts from realmarriedlife.comEarly this morning, Ben and I had such a sweet time talking – coffee for him, hot tea for me.  We were reminiscing, sharing funny thoughts. . . it was one of those great mornings together before we rushed off to start the day.  As we were talking, Ben told me I was a good wife.  What a wonderfully sweet thing to say.

It should have put a smile on my face to receive such a compliment from him – the only qualified judge of that.  But it didn’t.  I started to tear up and told him I didn’t believe him.  And I really didn’t.  I just felt guilty.  I told him of all the things around the house I hadn’t finished, the chores I was behind on, the things I hadn’t accomplished, the lack of time I had to focus on doing stuff for him – all qualifying me as a “bad wife.”

Have you ever felt like that?  That your success or failure all depends on [Read more…]